i'm watching a show on people who have won the lottery. most of them have gone banckrupt and many have turned to a life of drugs because they can't handle the sudden life of extreme weatlth. some have remained happy and healthy, but only if they managed their weath very carefully.

this got me to thinking...what would i do if i hit it big...for fun, lets say $500 million.

first, i would pay of whatever debts i have. right now, i don't have much, so that's good.

next, i would buy
this car. i would buy hubby one of these because he has always wanted one and because he already has two cars.

then, i would send my parents on a trip, maybe one like

next, i would go on a trip with hubby somewhere, maybe
like this.

then, i would go on a trip with my jackarandabush

then, i would buy a home like

i would go on monthly visits here for some pampering. i would also let hubby come along sometimes, if he was good.

the rest of the money would go into savings/money market accounts/ cds. i would take out some here and there for shopping and traveling, but i would do my best to be pretty tame about it.

what would you do if you won it big?

thirteen of my most favorite albums ~ in no particular order

1. duncan sheik ~ duncan sheik

2. greenday ~ dookie

3. garden state soundtrack

4. sublime ~ sublime

5. dixie chicks ~ wide open spaces

6. blink-182 ~ enema of the state

7. practical magic soundtrack

8. toad the wet sprocket ~ fear

9. duran duran ~ rio

10. good will hunting soundtrack

11. lily allen ~ alright, still...

12. chris ledoux ~ american cowboy

13. sarah evans ~ restless

*14. luscious jackson ~ electric honey

*15. letters to cleo ~ go!

* fine, so i can't pick just 13. big surprise~!

so we had a formula 3 racecar delivered to our office yesteday. did i mention i love my job? let me tell you, it was quite the ordeal to get it into the office...we have normal office doors and the racecar was just a wee bit too big to fit, so we had to literally take the car apart to get it in the door. it took 3 hours and about 7 men to do it....but here are the results. i stood by to make sure all went well and to go on a much needed beer and pizza run. you can call me speed racer now....

i was tagged by the delightful gypsy and thot i'd play along. i even stole her clever title.... :)

culinary guilt: cheese and bread. oh, and lemon panna cotta made by my most favorite pastry chef.
why: cheese is so delicious. i could eat it for every meal ~ and often do. bread is just a staple that i will never give up. and the panna cotta is like heaven. or really good sex. mmm....

literary guilt: skintilating romance novels
why: it's so different than my everyday life. hey, a girl can dream, can't she?

audiovisual guilt: porn, though i hardly ever watch it....but when i do....ooooh!
why: again, so different than my every day life.

musical guilt: bubble gum pop music
why: it makes me happy and want to dance around no matter what is going on in my life

celebrity guilt: watching e and reading us magazine with all the trashy people.
why: because it's so wacky. i just don't get how so many of them can live the crazy life that they do. they are not the beautiful people they think they are. those people are in vanity fare and have much more normal lives

i'm not going to tag anyone this time...but do play along if you feel the urge!

so i have a new music love....lily allen. she's freaking awesome. i must have listened to her cd at least 100 times today. i have it on repeat and i freaking love her. her voice rocks and she's just sassy. i caught a snippet of her song smile on mtv the other day then heard it again at starbucks and figured i should check out her cd...and bought it at starbucks. it's sooo good!

today i have spent running random errands and just hanging out home. one of my friends gave me a microwave this morning ~ we didn't have one ~ so i rearranged the mini kitchen to make room for it. i moved a bookshelf in from the mudroom and put the micowave on top and put my cookbooks on the bottom shelf and cooking supplies on the top shelf. it looks great! i'll have to get the final approval from hubby, who freaks out with change, so we'll see how that goes in a bit.

i went to the hardware store today and in the 5 minutes i was there, i was asked by 3 different guys who work there if i needed help. guess i was extra sassy today or somthin! :)

i'm going to make an extra special dinner tonight in honor of our new appliance. white castle cheeseburgers. yummy! and if that's wrong, i don't want it to be right!!!

Your 80s Theme Song Is:

Rio by Duran Duran
seriously. i'm not making this up. to back up a bit for those of you not in the know, i am a HUGE duran duran fan. rio is my most favorite song and i play it whenever i'm blue and it totally cheers me up. that and the refelx. i saw the boys when they were in concert a few years ago and it was hands down the best show i've ever been to. it was such a great nite...ahh...sweet memories.


You Are a Mac

You are creative, stylish, and super trendy.
You demand the best - even if it costs an arm and a leg.

at my new job we use super fly new macs. i love love love them. and i love love love the mac/pc commercials. they're awesome and so true. i had a mac when i was in college and loved it. it was one of the original imacs and it was red. i named her ruby. macs have always been far superior and i'm so glad i'm back to using them. i have a pc at home and it's just not the same. don't get me wrong, my sony vaio is a good computer, but it's nothing compared to my mac at work. and don't even get me started on how cool itunes and ipods are....

Your Aura is Red

You have a high level of emotion. This can mean passion, but it can also mean rage.
Usually, you don't take these emotions out on others. You just use them as motivation - and it works!

The purpose of your life: embracing all the wonders of the life, lots of travels, and tons of adventures

Famous reds include: Madonna, Marilyn Monroe, Jennifer Lopez

Careers for you to try: Dancer, Boxer, Surgeon

oh, my...

so tomorrow will be the end of my second week at the new job. holy coly! aside from today and my retardedness (see my previous post), everything has been great. i am so happy with this job. i'm thinking it's karma that has come around for me putting up with the crap in my past few jobs.

and, i actually get the 3 day weekend this weekend. woo hoo! i don't know the last time i actually got to take a holiday and get paid for it. ah. so good.

this weekend we're going to a birthday party on saturday night then i'm hanging out with two different girlfriends on sunday. one girlfriend i'm seeing in the afternoon and the other i'm going to dinner with. then on monday i'm meeting my sponsor for coffee in the morning. so even though i have some stuff planned, it should still be nice and relaxing. and, the weather is supposed to be in the low 70's over the weekend, so i'm really looking forward to that.

i was over and my mother-in-law's for a bit tonight for part of my side business. it went well and i actually made some mula, which is good. i won't see the mula for about a week or so, but that's just fine by me. i'm just so glad to be making money again.

i got another email from my dad this week asking me to call them. i never responded, nor did i call. if they want to talk to me so bad, they can call me. i'm not playing their stupid games anymore and will not let their guilt into my world.

i've had such a block in writing this week ~ normally i can find things to post about but i've just felt so dull lately. i hope i snap out of it soon.

thirteen things that happened to me/that i did today:

1. i got paid the biggest paycheck every! okay, it was my biggest paycheck...hubby's checks are still larger, which i have absolutely no problem with.

2. i used my new sugar scrub in the shower this morning and evidently i used too much or didn't rinse my hair well enough because by mid day, my hair was a gooey, oily mess. (no, i didn't put the scrub on my hair, it's just that my hair is pretty long so when it hung down my back, it also hung in the scrub).

3. i went home at lunch time and totally fell asleep on the floor with the cats! i was gone from the office for an hour and a half!

4. i had to meet my 2 bosses at their lunch to pick up their house keys so i could go to their house and leave a note on their door for the cable guy.

5. i dropped the ball on buying a washer and dryer for the bosses so one of them ended up doing it was i was napping with the cats.

6. i attempted to translate a contract in german, but ended up giving up since there were too many industry words that i didn't know, but that was okay because someone in our london office was able to do the translation.

7. i got my make up order from sephora.

8. i got business cards and letterhead from a side business that i have.

9. i planned a trip to take hubby to the giants spring training in scottsdale, arizona for a weekend in 3 weeks.

10. i took another shower to de-goo myself ~ no scrub this time!

11. i got off work after i dropped a ups off at the drop-off center at 3:40 pm ~ normally i'm off at 5:30.

12. i went to payless and bought 4 pairs of awesome shoes for under $50!

13. i took out the trash because tomorrow is trash day.


i was just wandering around and came across this fun site. weird because i was looking for stewart/colbert stuff just yesterday. anyhow, i ordered a long sleve t-shirt. these two shows are the funniest ever. they're all about the truthiness. ha.

this weekend has been a bit busy. friday after work i went to a launch party my office was hosting, then headed over to a girlfriends house for a candle party. saturday i met a friend for coffee then went grocery shopping. hubby and i cleaned the house and i took a nap. his folks came over for dinner in the evening. i made chicken and roasted veggies. i used parsnips for the first time. they were great! my mother-in-law got drunk, as usual.

today we got up and drove around looking for houses. it was such a nice day out. it had rained since thursday, so today was the pretty day-after-the-rain. everything was damp and we saw a bunch of rainbows. everything was so crisp and clean. we didn't really see any houses in our price range, but we did drive all over creation and had a lot of fun.

but by the time we got home, my back was KILLING me. we had gone in our old skool land cruiser and the seats are so old and there's no support in them and it kills me when we go for long rides. i rolled around on the big excersise ball that we have and that helped. then the kitties and i took a long nap ~ that definitely helped, too. :)

now i'm just hanging out, not wanting to do much of anything. my back still hurts but i'm eating chocolate and crackers. hubby just asked me if i'm pmsing...what? just because i'm eating salty and sweet? okay, so maybe i am...

i need to take off my nailpolish because it's looking pretty ragged. it's still on from when i was home a few weeks ago. my toes still look great, but my fingers are a bit of a disaster. maybe i'll go soak in a bubble bath...

thirteen of my most favorite books

1. cherry by mary karr

2. skinny legs and all by tom robbins

3. the crimson petal and the white by michael farber

4. interpreter of maladies by jhumpa lahiri

5. the secret life of bees by sue monk kidd

6. the next step in the dance by tim gautreaux

7. the ice queen by alice hoffman

8. the woman warrior by maxine hong kingston

9. the mercy of thin air by ronlyn domingue

10. the courtesan by susan carroll

11. sea glass by anita shreve

12. summer sisters by judy blume

13. the liar's club by mary karr

14. the rise & fall of a teen-age wacko by mary anderson

okay, so that's 14. what can i say? i love to read! and trust me, there are so many more books that i could have added...

a few weeks ago i stumbled across this book at borders and instantly fell in love. i had no idea it was part of a series. i could not put it down and was so into the book that i lost track of time every time i picked it up.

i am now on the third book and while not too much was lost to me starting with the second book, then going to the first and on to the third, i do recommend reading them in order. they are so fun and amazing.

i hope the rest of her books are just as well written. and i must say, i do have such a love affair with renaissance france!

my nose is cold

fin is the king of the house! as i was leaving for work this morning, i heard the deep growl of frustration coming from him. i tracked him down, and low and behold, he had caught another mouse in the house! i grabbed him and dashed into the bathroom where i held him and the mouse over the toilet while trying to get the mouse out of fin's death grip. i finally got the mouse out and fin gave me a gnarly gash in my leg, but it was well worth it. i praised him and fed him extra kitty treats.

work went well, again. if this is a dream, i just don't want to wake up. we have a fly coffee maker at work ~ it grinds the beans and brews the coffee per cup ~ so that is delightful. we also have a mini fridge stocked with the essentials ~ red bull, water, soda, champagne ~ because you never know when a celebration might just break out!

it's also still a dream to me that i get to arrive at 8:30 am. for the last two years i've had to be at work sooo much earlier. it gives me so much time to get ready in the morning. it's really quite nice. and there's no time clock, no big brother watching. it's great. i can eat or drink at my desk whatever and whenever i want. i can also leave the office if i need to whenever i want ~ like for lunch. last last two days i've run some errands and stopped by my house. oh. and did i mention my insurance coverage? yeah. 100% coverage for me and hubby. wow. unheard of. and i get to work on a fly mac. i do love macs. they're so great and are so far superior to pc's. (sorry, pc fans!).

so i have held strong and not contacted my parents. my dad sent me another delightful email on monday ~ shortly after i got off the phone crying ~ that said " what is going on with you? why are you acting the way you are?" i never responded. then today, i got a card in the mail from them. upon seeing it, it gave me a small glimmer of hope that maybe they realized what they had done. i opened the card, and on the cover it says " congratulations on your new job" then on the inside " wishing you a happy future and success in everything you do " and was signed " your parents" um....okay. first of all, my mother makes each and every card that she sends, this one was clearly bought somewhere cheap. and second, there was nothing written by them except "your parents". whatever. i'm over it.

well, time to do the dreaded dishes that have piled up since monday....

so today was the first day of my new job....and it went great! i think i have finally found my dream job ~ or at least something darn near close to it! when i woke up at 7 am, i realized i had a whole hour and a half before i had to be at work. for the past two years, i had to be at work at the ungodly hour of 6 am so today was fantastic. i got up, took a long shower, watched the news, had coffee and didn't even have to rush at all!

i knew the attire was casual, but i still wore slacks, heals a button up shirt and a sweater. tomorrow, i'm wearing jeans, as everyone else had them on today. while i didn't feel over dressed, i totally want to wear jeans. i have never been able to wear jeans to work! not even on a casual friday! i always had to wear khakis....

everyone was really kind and friendly. and they treated me like i was such a smart girl! it was great. when i walked in, a was handed a new cell phone ~ a thin black moto ~ and business cards! talk about service! things just continued to go well from there. the environment is relaxed and casual. things will get hectic from time to time, but nothing deranged. the guys i work for are great. it's so nice to be around people who aren't catty and obnoxious. they took me to lunch at a fun place in town and showed me the fly house they're renting until their wives move out this summer some time.

everyone has these great new macs to work on and everyone takes turn playing dj for the office. right now we're in an old victorian building that's like a large loft. everything is open and decorated with a very cool feel. it reminds me a lot of an adverstising agency hubby worked at a while back.

all in all, it was a really good day. later, when i checked my blog, i found that one of my favorite bloggers, october, has returned. i'm so glad! i missed her.

oh, and so i haven't spoken to my parents since i left their house on wednesday. sure, i left a message to let them know i got home all right and i called once over the weekend for something else, but i haven't actually spoken to them. my dad sent me an email over the weekend saying that i needed to call my mother because she thinks i'm mad at her. um...is there a problem with her hand picking up the phone? yeah, it's called passive aggressive behavior. i love it when she pulls that shit. or not. anyhow, i called tonight because i wanted to share my good day with them. bad thinking. dad said i woke him up from a nap and asked if i was calling again to ask for money. i told him that i got paid in 2 weeks, thinking he would say something nice about me starting a job, but no. he didn't. he told me to call back in an hour.

i just called. i cannot belive this. my mother is so angry with me she won't even talk to me. I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID. he said i made her walk home from the grocery store. that is such bullshit. i drove her to the store, waited while she shopped and drove her home. i am so upset right now i have tears streaming down my cheeks. now she's lying to him! she said i didn't help her at all last weekend and that is SO WRONG. i did so much work. i can't even speak right now. i totally lost it with my dad. i broke down crying and and told him i couldn't take it anymore. he told me to stop yelling. i wasn't yelling. i was crying. god damn them.

i have to share my new delicious finds....both products are from bath and body works and are sooo delightfully yummie. i took a very decadent bubble bath today and mmmm! it was good.

this is the relax aromatherapy eucalyptus spearmint soothing sugar scrub

and this is the very luscious midnight pomegranate bubble bath. i also got the hand cream and it's equally yummie.

and while this isn't a bath product, i couldn't resist including it here. i just got this fun bronzer/highlighter from benefit, aptly named perfect 10. it just makes me glow!

aahhhh. sweet relief. i just got back from my delicious 90 minute massage. it was sooo good. and not surprisingly...my attitude has been adjusted. all that deep breathing and good vibes that floated around the spa most definitely helped, too. i am ready to take on the world. okay, not really, but i do feel a lot better.

i am going to put the past few days behind me and just go forward. i will not look back. well, i will, but not with the hope that things will get better. i have to resign to the fact that they will not, no matter how hard i try.

the fact that both my parents told me i was an inconvenience to them and that they both accused me on 2 seperate occasions of being drunk ~ um...i have been sober for one year and 4 months ~ is completly and utterly inexscusable. and that's just only a little part of the past few days.

i am slowly coming to terms with things. my drive back to hubby and the kitties yesterday was long and gave me a lot of deep thinking time. i am in a good place here. hubby and i are working on our relationship and i have the world's best friends. and for that, i am so thankful.

i start my new job on monday and i can't wait! i'm very excited about my new venture. it's going to be great ~ i just know it. i will finally be back to a normal working schedule ~ monday - friday 8:30 - 5:30. and the atmosphere there seems great. and i can wear jeans to work! nice jeans, of course, but still. i don't have to wear suits or stockings, so that's a definite plus. oh, and i have such a tiny commute. and it's the highest paying job i've had to date!

now if only my house would clean itself....

dilly tagged me, so now i must provide to you five things you may not know about me...

1. i was adopted on halloween. but after this weekend, and subsequent conversations/deep thinking episodes, i have come to the conclusion that my parents should never have adopted a child. they in no way knew how to raise one and are stuck so far in a deep hole that they need to be alone without anyone else.

2. i am allergic to acetominaphin, which is basically tylenol. so that sucks.

3. i believe in fairies

4. i would like to be published in the new yorker one day. of course, that would mean i would actually have to write and submit something....

5. i would love to live on the coast

now i will tag sally, kate, gypsy and you!

thirteen things i have to do today

1. get a 90 minute massage at 10 am

2. go to the grocery store since we are out of pretty much everything

3. get car insurance for the trail blazer since we finally own it outright ~ it was a company car from hubby's last job but they sold it to us for real cheap as part of his severence package.

4. pay rent ~ i can't believe it's already february!

5. return all the phone calls/emails i got while away in la

6. but lightbulbs for the 2 lamps the kitties knocked down and broke while i was gone

7. do a lot of laundry, since hubby somehow doesn't know how to do it

8. do a lot of dishes, see above

9. clean the house, see above

10. schedule a haircut for tomorrow ~ split ends be gone!

11. pick up dry cleaning

12. pay bills

13. realize how wonderful it is to be loved and wanted here by hubby and the kitties and that things didn't get done around here because hubby wasn't sure of the way that i do things ~ okay, so he was lazy, but it still feels good that that was the reason he gave me.

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