an even deeper breath

what a freaking long day. long emotional day. after work i went to mc donalds, because i deserved it, then went to the scrapbook store when i spent $94 in the matter of about 20 minutes. retail therapy did help, but not as much as i thought it might.

i got home at the same time that c did and we chatted for a bit. it was constructive, but i still wasn't feeling much better, so i went to a meeting at 5:30 this evening. it was a living sober meeting. i shared and was overcome by emotion and totally started crying. i've never done that before. i got 3 phone numbers from new women that i hadn't met before. i stayed after and talked to a few more women. one of them said she'd call me tomorrow. i hope she does. but if she doesn't, i will call her.

i got home around the same time as c again (he went to get a massage). i started dinner and installed a new font program on my computer (for better scrapping). and now i am beat. like a red headed step child. i do feel a bit better, though. thank you to those of you who sent me loving thoughts. i do take everything you've said seriously and am working on myself. tomorrow i am going to spend some time at the spa after work, to decompress. i need time for me. tomorrow i will be selfish and it will be all about me.

love to you all, and thank you for being my friends. now will you please hurry up and move to where i am? ~okay so i started my selfishness a little early...~

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