skybluepink

* my nausea is pretty much gone. i am a little over 12 weeks, so thank god. yesterday i had my second doctor's appointment where i got to hear peanut's heart beat for the first time. it was pretty wild. it still hasn't really hit me that i'm pregnant, though.

* the wedding in tahoe was an adventure, to be sure. we left early last friday and got to our destination in 3 hours. our hotel was real nice and after lunch we took a nice long nap as snow fell outside. we met up with friends for a cocktail and desert reception later that evening. saturday we hung out in the hotel as it was nasty outside. we were picked up at 2:30p by shuttle and taken to the ceremony location. it was snowing like crazy and we were so glad not to be driving. and wearing heels in the snow is something that i hope never to have to do again! from the ceremony we were whisked away to the reception at a golf course. (sidenote...who plans a wedding during february in tahoe!?) the reception was nice and it was great to see all of our friends. the weather overnight was awful and we were afraid we were going to be snowed in. we were for a while, but did manage to leave town around noon on sunday. 80 miles of the highway out of town were closed due to the high levels of snow that had fallen the night before and it ended up taking us 5 hours to get home. not bad, considering it was a sunday in the middle of ski season. but, we figure it was due to everyone staying in to watch the superbowl. thank god for that!

* my parents arrived sometime over the weekend. we met up with them for dinner on monday night at the place i work. my dad made his typical stupid comments throughout dinner to our waiter. and he grossly undertipped.

* i have decided not to attend the shower my my mother is throwing for our whisky tango friend. i know it will be too much for me to go down there and besides, i'll be going to the wedding a month later.

* i finally had to lay the smack down with hubby yesterday morning. he can be really condecending and rude and i finally had enough. he can be quite relentless in his asshat ways and i told him i wouldn't talk to him anymore until he was nice to me. he loves to tell me what a bad driver i am because i a) got a speeding ticket 5 years ago, b) got into 2 minor fender benders when i was still drinking over 2 years ago and c) got into that accident in november. he also likes to tell me i'm fat. and not because i'm pregnant, either. he just thinks i'm fat. um..seriously? i am five feet tall and weigh 105 lbs and have for a while now. he tells me i'm the laziness person he knows. gee, sorry i like to take naps and not run around like crazy at all times. it's called relaxing. it's what i do after a busy work day/week. he tells me i'm using pregnancy as an excuse to not do housework. are you kidding me? we have a housekeeper who comes every friday and we have minimal upkeep during the week. what he is really complaing about is that my head has been in the toilet or i have been curled up in the fetal position instead of doing the dishes or the laundry. i could go on, but i won't. he did apologize for being an asshat, but i'm still not convinced he will act any nicer any time soon.

* i have to get a speaker for the friday night aa meeting i secretary and i really don't want to have to talk to anyone. this means i will probably have to go to the meeting tonight, which is late and i won't get home until 9:30, which has been past my bedtime these days. aa to me has become way more social than anything else. hubby is an aa natzi and i just can't relate. to me, it's a good place to socialize with others who have a drinking problem. i just don't buy into everything else. it's not my way of life.

* i have a new boss who thinks that i'm sensitive to the ways a certain nasty woman at work treats me and everyone around her because i'm pregnant. obviously he has had a bit too much of the work kool-aid. she is a nasty back stabbing bitch and it's not because i'm pregnant that i think that. i have always thought that.

* i really, really, really want to go back on my anti-anxiety meds. but, i have weighted the pros and cons and will wait until after i give birth to do so. when i told my father that i wanted to back on them because i am really irritable and get fussy way fast now, he said "well, you've always been that way." um, no shit. that's why those meds helped me. i wasn't like that when i was on them. meds can help you for legitimate reasons. i'm not taking them to be cool or because i haven't already exhaused the other options.